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Saturday, October 4, 2008

♥ 4 october 2008,saturday

I cannot take it anymore.....i cannot face her anymore..i think its right that cannot run away forever..but..at least..at least i can run away now...its just so painful....the burden is too heavy already..i don't wish to face her anymore.....i just realised...just realised that its impossible to let her understand about my thinking......i hated it....just quarreled again...and she's out now cause she don't want to see me....i want to get out of here....i'll escape..as far as possible...if only i'm allowed to......:(.......if only..if only i'm not home today...it would be perfect if i'm not at home....and it would be even perfect if i can disappear from this world..its not just throwing tantrum......if there's a chance for me to be in a coma...i'll just sleep as long as i want to...i wouldn't want to wake up again.....it would be good if fa xing and ru yi are here with me.....i'll be able to confide in them.......i'll even exchange with them...allow them to come to this house.....to be able to be alive......i lifted my courage a few days ago and showed her my results......and her response was as expected...''u've only got a 6th position..its not good enough.....why are you not the 1st?.....and your poa...why are you not the 1st in class?......you only got a 79.....''...i can only keep quiet at that moment.......i couldn't say anything anymore....although its already expected,i still feel guilty like normal......therefore,its better to escape than to face it.....i tried facing it..but what i got back are injuries.....i do not wish to get hurt again.........i shall end off here today..........

(i'm sorry that i have to vent my anger and unhappiness like this.....but..there's no other way for me to do it.....i want to get away....)

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I AM GRUMPY.
5:48 PM


♥ theGrumpyToast ;



      theGrumpyToast is very grumpy. Beware, this toast bites.

      Name:Sin yi;MA-to-be:D
      Age:16
      School:yishun town secondary school
      Gender: Female
      D.O.B.: 31 August 1992
      Location: Singapore
      Horoscope: Virgo
      Email: leesy_92love@hotmail.com:D

      xX LOVES Xx

      1)GF;22nd nov 2008:D
      2)SWEETHEART:D
      3)girlfriend2
      4)boyfriend
      5)JZ-lao gong
      6)freedom
      7)school
      8)CKK
      9)comics
      10)clique 1
      11)buddy
      12)clique 2
      13)8th october 2008
      14)LAO LAO:D...geezz...

      xX WISHLIST Xx

      to be a CKK instructor asap..
      10 pointers for 'O's..
      to be free from her...
      to japan with gf at year end
      memorable birthday:)
      to be able to run away from everything
      stress-free:D
      to the graduating overseas trip
      have lots of CHY HB...
      to be love...
      one shelf of comics and animes collections:)
      to have a happy family....
      5N2 to be more unitied and bonded:)
      all 5N2 people to score well and break the records:D...
      to go for more outings with clique 1 and clique 2:D...
      to have a better relationship with HER...
      TO BE A DOCTOR WHEN I GROW UP:)
      to buy Gii asap:D...



♥ Thank you


bu liao liao zhi -

♥ Past rawr-ing